EDIT: I want to clarify that the teacher I spoke to about as close to a supervisor as any one else at this school, where co-operative values indicate that the staff work together through a consensus and there is no principal. Also it was depression talking when I said “hate”. The teacher never used that word: she just said that the kids didn’t like me and felt like I came across as angry at them too easily and when they were not expecting it. She also said that I “replaced a teacher that they liked…” which implies, to me, that they *don’t* like me. She wasn’t sure if they disliked me personally, or if they just felt like they were suddenly stuck with a program where it was great for little kids but not for them.

I agree, with the gist of the comments: Shock! Middle schoolers who don’t like a new authority figure! The worst bit about this piece of feedback is how late it was in the coming. Now they’ve had it in their minds (and yes, there’s a lot of conforming to one another) that they don’t like me or After School. It is hard to change that, but I have to try.

At this school, these middle school kids apparently like all the OTHER teachers… just not the new one (me.) Who happens to be the mother of a “little kid” (second grader).

— end EDIT —

Here I am, the night before Mother’s Day.

My house is a mess.

I have two hours worth of cleaning at my daughter’s school that I have to do before the weekend is up.

My mom is coming to visit tomorrow morning, and sleeping over tomorrow night.

I have mother’s day presents for my mom, and mother-in-law: but the catch is I haven’t planted the flowers in the hanging pots I bought yet.

I just put my kids to bed about 10 minutes ago (yes, wow, that’s awfully late for them, isn’t it. Hmmm…)

I just started a brand new anti-depressant and I am on the lookout for brain zaps.

I met with a teacher that works at the school where I work just this morning to review how my job has been going. She was a kind of emissary from the rest of the staff who’d had a meeting and voiced their concerns and comments about my job performance so far. I found out that a) I’ve been showing up to work at the wrong time b) there are rules about the kids’ limits that nobody had bothered to tell me and c) it turns out that the fifth graders all hate me and hate going to after school. That was hard.

Of course, it’s not all bad with my job. The younger kids adore me (that’s the kindergarteners, the first graders, second graders, and third graders. The fourth graders are not quite sure. The seventh and eighth graders get along with me ok. It’s those damn middle school kids. The ones who pout and roll their eyes and won’t talk to me. They won’t tell me what they want to do but they also don’t like anything I suggest. The only thing they like is sitting together on the bench and chatting. I let them do that. They like that, but otherwise they hate me.

So: grades K-3: I’m great. 4: I’m not sure. 5-6: They hate me. 7-8: They like me. My feelings are a little hurt, but I am trying to rally myself to just keep trying. I’ll talk to the teachers of the kids who hate me and ask them for advice. Wonder what they do to not be hated by these pugnacious tweens with attytood.

As I go around cleaning here and there, thither and yon tonight, I have one thing on my mind. It’s the pouty face of the tween girl in my after school program most weeks. What can I do to get through to her?